February 23, 2009

"Commit your way to the Lord, Trust also in Him, and He will do it." Psalm 37:5 (NAS)

Whose Hands?

A basketball in my hands is worth about $19.

A basketball in Michael Jordan's hands is worth about $33 million.

It depends on whose hands it's in.

A baseball in my hands is worth about $20.00

A baseball in Mark McGwire's hands is worth $19 million.

It depends on whose hands it's in.

A tennis racket is useless in my hands.

A tennis racket in Pete Sampras' hands is a Wimbledon Championship.

It depends on whose hands it's in.

A stick in my hands will keep away a wild animal.

A stick in Moses' hands will part the mighty sea.

It depends on whose hands it's in.

A sling shot in my hands is a kid's toy.

A sling shot in David's hand is a mighty weapon.

It depends on whose hands it's in.

Two fish and 5 loaves of bread in my hands is a couple fish sandwiches.

Two fish and 5 loaves of bread in Jesus' hands will feed thousands.

It depends on whose hands it's in.

Nails in my hands might produce a birdhouse.

Nails in Jesus Christ's hands will produce salvation for the entire world.

It depends on whose hands it's in.

As you see now it depends whose hands it's in. So put your concerns, your worries, your fears, your hopes, your dreams, your families and your relationships in God's hands because, It depends on whose hands it's in. (Copied - author unknown.)

Thought for the week: A cult is a religion with no political power.    -- Tom Wolfe

Funny for the week: "Rustic Dining"

As a trail guide in a national park, Danny ate with the rest of the seasonal staff in a rustic dining hall, where the food left something to be desired. When they were finished with their meals, they scraped the remains into a garbage pail and stacked the plates for the dishwasher.

One worker, apparently not too happy after his first week on the job, was ahead of Danny in line. As he slopped an uneaten plate of food into the garbage, Danny heard him mutter, "Now stay there this time."

I ate there once…………… Chaplain Barnes

Last week’s answer: What were the purposes of the two Jewish calendars? One for civil use and one for sacred use.

This week’s question: Finish the following: "In all thy ways acknowledge him…"

February 16, 2009

"The steps of a good man are ordered by the Lord; and he delights in his way." Psalm 37:23

The following article came to me via the internet and I have no idea who wrote it, but it is good and I wanted to share it with you.

"Sometimes we make such great plans, where we are going, how fast we want to get there, and the best friends we want to go with. Then the Lord sends us a DETOUR. We kick, scream, yell and screech trying to follow our plan. We have no idea what to expect, we panic, we connive and develop an alternate plan. We question His motives. Many great things the Lord wants to show you, but sometimes He has to take you off the path. He will send you on a DETOUR to meet a certain person. He will send you on a DETOUR to get a certain job. He will send you on a DETOUR to become a special person. HE will send you on a DETOUR to separate you from the pack. DETOURS mean a change in direction, not denial. That unpleasant situation you are in may be a DETOUR. That horrible job that you can't stand may be a DETOUR. That city you are living in and you hate, may be a DETOUR. Failure at work or school may be a DETOUR. The good news is that when God puts you on a DETOUR, He always gets you back on the RIGHT path!" (In His way and in His time)

Thought for the week: Now I know what a statesman is; he's a dead politician. We need more statesmen.
            -- Bob Edwards

Funny for the week: "Store Safety"

While attending college, I worked evenings at a retail store. On slow nights my co-worker Susan would often sing along with the radio while we did paperwork or restocked merchandise.

One evening as the manager was leaving I expressed my concern to him about our safety, being two women working alone at night.

"Oh, you'll be fine," he said, waving of his hand. "If you see anybody who looks suspicious, just warn him that Susan knows karaoke."

I just love puns……………….. Chaplain Barnes

Last week’s answer: Which is the only miracle of Jesus recorded in all four gospels? Feeding of the 5,000

This week’s question: What were the purposes of the two Jewish calendars?

February 9, 2009

"How happy is the one whose transgression is forgiven, whose sin is pardoned! Happy indeed is the one to whom the Lord does not ascribe guilt!" Psalm 32:1-2

I like what Steve Brown once said, "You do not understand something until you can illustrate it so someone else can understand it." This is especially true of spiritual truths. It is strange how many people can know something and not really know something. Take forgiveness for example. We all know God forgives, right? But has this truth ever sunk into your heart? Everyone reading this devotion would have to admit they have done something they are ashamed of. I have, you have, we all have. Intellectually, you know that you have been forgiven. But has it sunk into your heart? Have you ever been overwhelmed with the fact that God has totally cleansed you from your past sins? That, in His eyes you are as spiritually clean as if you had never sinned? It's nice to intellectually know you are forgiven. But when this truth sinks into your heart, it then becomes a life changing blessing that results in you loving the Lord. If you can illustrate this kind of forgiveness so someone else can understand it, send the illustration to me. I would love to share it with others. Thank you in advance for sharing.

Thought for the week: My wife and I were happy for twenty years. Then we met. -- Rodney Dangerfield

 

Funny for the week: "Fax Hint"

As a professor at the Air Force Institute of Technology, I taught a series of popular courses on software engineering. The program was highly competitive and difficult to get into, but one student made our decision whether to accept him quite simple.

When asked to fax over his college transcript, the student told me, "Well, I would, but it's the only copy I have."

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"Anti-Gravity"

I found a very interesting book about anti-gravity.

I just can't put it down!

I got it…………………did you? Chaplain Barnes

Last week’s answer: Name the only full brother of Joseph, ruler of Egypt. Benjamin (Gen 35:24)

This week’s question: Which is the only miracle of Jesus recorded in all four gospels?

February 2, 2009

"Your adversary the devil prowls around like a roaring lion, seeking someone to devour. Resist him, firm in your faith..." 1 Peter 5:8-9

I have been studying about the warfare we as Christians face. There are several facts I would like for you to know:

1. The battle is won and lost in the mind.

2. You can not fight something you can not see, feel, touch or understand.

3. Satan is a cruel warrior who plays despicably dirty.

4. Only Jesus Christ can defeat the enemy for you. Forewarned is Forearmed. Become aware of the tricks from your spiritual enemy and pray when you have spiritual vulnerable times. He is most vicious when your are most vulnerable, so spend time with the Lord before you face the trials. Cry out to the only one who can fight the spiritual battles for you. The one who has already defeated him once and for all is the only one who has the authority to rebuke him now. Resist Satan and Jesus Christ will make sure he will flee. Submit to him, and he will devour you.

Thought for the week: Procrastination isn't the problem, it's the solution. So procrastinate now, don't put it off.
            -- Ellen DeGeneres

Funny for the week: "Poker Question"

A rabbi and his two friends, a priest and a minister, played poker for small stakes once a week. The only problem was that they lived in a very conservative blue-law town. The sheriff raided their game and took all three before the local judge.

After listening to the sheriff's story, the judge sternly inquired of the priest: "Were you gambling, Father?" The priest looked toward heaven, whispered, "Oh, Lord, forgive me!" and then said aloud: "No, your honor, I was not gambling."

"Were you gambling, Reverend?" the judge asked the minister. The minister repeated the priest's actions and said, "No, your honor, I was not."

Turning to the third clergyman, the judge asked: "Were you gambling, Rabbi?"

The rabbi eyed him coolly and replied "With whom?"

If only it was that easy……………… Chaplain Barnes

Last week’s answer: Fill in the blank of this advice to Christians with one word: "Be not forgetful to entertain strangers: for thereby some have entertained angels unawares." (Heb. 13:1)

This week’s question: Name the only full brother of Joseph, ruler of Egypt.