October 25, 2010

“…surely the Lord is in this place, and I did not know it.” Gen. 28:16

He wore bib overhauls every day, even to church. He drove an older model Buick and loved his peach farm. He was advanced in years and had turned most of the day to day operation over to his sons and hired hands. He lived with his bride of 70 years in the house they built decades ago and where they raised their boys. He started out with a dairy farm and when the price of milk fell, converted to peach farming. He saved his money and loaned it to churches wishing to build new facilities. Many times I sat beside him at church dinners and chatted about unimportant things. It was only several years after his death that I learned I had been in the presence of one of the wealthiest men in the county I was living in at that time, and I did not know it. He never hinted at his wealth, never flaunted it like the Hollywood set. He just lived a quite peaceable life and used his money to expand the Kingdom of God. I have often wondered how many times I have also been in the presence of God and have been too busy or insensitive to know it? How many times has he come to me as a street person asking for help, or a stranger setting alone on a bench and I blazed by to accomplish lesser things? Maybe you have too. Ask God to open your eyes to see Him in the day to day intercourse you have with people. You have nothing to loose and everything to gain.

Thought for the week: Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.
-- Oscar Wilde

Funny for the week: "A Touch of Home"

Although we were being married in New Hampshire, I wanted to add a touch of my home state, Kansas, to the wedding. My fiancée, explaining this to a friend, said that we were planning to have wheat rather than rice thrown after the ceremony.

Our friend thought for a moment. Then he said solemnly, "It's a good thing she's not from Idaho."

Yelp, flying spuds would sure hurt…Chaplain Barnes

Last week’s answer:

7. Who saw the star in the East?

a. Shepherds

b. Mary and Joseph

c. Three Kings

d. Both A and C

e. None of the above The Wise Men did. (They were not Kings) See Matt. 2:2

This week’s question:

8. How many Angels spoke to the Shepherds?

a. One

b. Three

c. A “multitude”

d. None of the above

October 18, 2010

“I will instruct you and teach you in the way that you should go; I will guide you with my eye upon you. Do not be like the horse or the mule;…whose temperament must be curbed with bit and bridle.” Psalm 34:8-9

I am going to let you in on a secret: I like my comfort zone! Bet none of you are guilty of that. Let God start nudging me to serve him in a new or different way and man, I can find more excuses and arguments why not to than congress can find sink holes to pour taxes into. I invent reasons why it will not work and rationalize why I should not be the one to do it. I thought I had a monopoly on that art until I read my Bible and found a lot of company. Even though I often quote the proverb, “The only thing that does not change is change”, I resist it in my own life. Fear of the unknown may only be human, but some of us are over gifted with it. Yet in it’s purest form, it is nothing more than faithlessness and that is sin. The passage quoted above says that if God calls you to something, he will equip you to do it. He will guide you and he will protect you while you do it. Not only that, when he tells you to open a new door, there is always a special blessing behind that door. So, if you feel God has been calling you to some task that scares you to death, go ahead, take a deep breath, turn the door knob and walk in and enjoy God’s blessing. Me? I prefer to stay here and make sure everything stays the same, just in case. But then again, maybe…..

Thought for the week: There's no secret about success. Did you ever know a successful man who didn't tell you about it? -- Kin Hubbard

Funny for the week: HEAVEN AND HELL

While walking down the street one day a Corrupt Senator was tragically hit by a car and died.
His soul arrives in heaven and is met by St. Peter at the entrance.
"Welcome to heaven," says St. Peter. "Before you settle in, it seems there is a problem. We seldom see a high official around these parts, you see, so we ' re not sure what to do with you."
"No problem, just let me in," says the Senator..
"Well, I ' d like to, but I have orders from the higher ups. What we ' ll do is have you spend one day in hell and one in heaven. Then you can choose where to spend eternity."
"Really?, I ' ve made up my mind. I want to be in heaven," says the Senator.
"I ' m sorry, but we have our rules."
And with that, St. Peter escorts him to the elevator and he goes down, down, down to hell.
The doors open and he finds himself in the middle of a green golf course. In the distance is a clubhouse and standing in front of it are all his friends and other politicians who had worked with him. Everyone is very happy and in evening dress. They run to greet him, shake his hand, and reminisce about the good times they had while getting rich at the expense of the people.

They played a friendly game of golf and then dine on lobster, caviar and the finest champagne.
Also present is the devil, who really is a very friendly guy who is having a good time dancing and telling jokes. They are all having such a good time that before the Senator realizes it, it is time to go. Everyone gives him a hearty farewell and waves while the elevator rises...
The elevator goes up, up, up and the door reopens in heaven where St. Peter is waiting for him, "Now it ' s time to visit heaven.." So, 24 hours passed with the Senator joining a group of contented souls moving from cloud to cloud, playing the harp and singing. They have a good time and, before he realizes it, the 24 hours have gone by and St. Peter returns. "Well, then,

you 've spent a day in hell and another in heaven. Now choose your eternity."
The Senator reflects for a minute, then he answers: "Well, I would never have said it before, I mean heaven has been delightful, but I think I would be better off in hell."
So St. Peter escorts him to the elevator and he goes down, down, down to hell..
Now the doors of the elevator open and he's in the middle of a barren land covered with waste and garbage. He sees all his friends, dressed in rags, picking up the trash and putting it in black bags as more trash falls from above. The devil comes over to him and puts his arm around his shoulders.
"I don ' t understand," stammers the Senator. "Yesterday I was here and there was a golf course and clubhouse, and we ate lobster and caviar, drank champagne, and danced and had a great time. Now there ' s just a wasteland full of garbage and my friends look miserable. What happened?"
The devil smiles at him and says,
"Yesterday we were campaigning ...
Today, you voted.."

ouch………….. Chaplain Barnes

Last week’s answer:

6. Which animals does the Bible say were present at Jesus’ birth?

a. Cows, sheep, goats

b. Cows, donkeys, sheep

e. Sheep and goats only

d. Miscellaneous barnyard animals

e. Lions, tigers, elephants

f. None of the above The Bible does not name any being present

This week’s question:

7. Who saw the star in the East?

a. Shepherds

b. Mary and Joseph

c. Three Kings

d. Both A and C

e. None of the above

October 11, 2010

Things God does for us. Psalm 103. Check it out!

1. He pardons all your iniquities
2. He heals all your diseases.
3. He redeems your life from the pit.
4. He crowns you with loving kindness and compassion.
5. He satisfies your years with good things.
6. He performs righteous deeds and judgments.
7. He makes known His ways to you.
8. He is compassionate and gracious; slow to anger and abounding in loving kindness.
9. He will not always strive with us or keep his anger forever.
10. He does not deal with us according to our sins, or reward us according to our iniquities.
11. He removes our transgressions from us.
12. He has compassion on us like a father, on those who fear him.
13. His loving-kindness is from everlasting to everlasting (that’s a long time)
14. His righteousness is to the children’s children who keep His covenant.

Thought for the week: An atheist is a man who has no invisible means of support.

-- John Buchan

Funny for the week: "Census Taker"

An old man was sitting on his porch, when a young man walked up with a pad and pencil in his hand.

"What are you selling, young man?" he asked.

"I'm not selling anything, sir," the young man replied. "I'm the census taker."

"A what?" the man asked.

"A census taker. We are trying to find out how many people are in the United States."

"Well," the man answered, "you're wasting your time with me; I have no idea."

Census or Sense taker?....... Chaplain Barnes

Last week’s answer:

5. A “manger” is a:

a. Stable for domestic animals

b. Wooden hay storage bin

c. Feeding trough

d. Barn

This week’s question:

6. Which animals does the Bible say were present at Jesus’ birth?

a. Cows, sheep, goats

b. Cows, donkeys, sheep

e. Sheep and goats only

d. Miscellaneous barnyard animals

e. Lions, tigers, elephants

f. None of the above

October 4, 2010

“Let no one say he is tempted by God…” James 1:13

A solicitation to evil is never from God, but from within the man – his own inner lusts. Sin begins with an inward lust. When a temptation is presented, it entices the lust within a person. The lust then dwells on the temptation causing the person to respond in the direction of the temptation. “Carried away.” A sin begins in the heart and thoughts of a person, drawing that person into an action which is the outward manifestation and proof of the inward decision. Lust, like a baby, is conceived and grows inside, seemingly unknown at first until it is full term. Then is dramatic “painful” form, it comes to light. The sin when born has a life of it’s own which continues to maturity ultimately bringing death to the very one who birthed it. Be sure, your sin’s will find you out, and kill you. You think about that, Amen.

Thought for the week: I believe in equality for everyone, except reporters and photographers. --- Mahatma Gandhi

Funny for the week: "Lost Pigs"

Howard County Police officers still write their reports by hand, and the data is entered later by a computer tech into their database. One theft report stated that a farmer had lost 2,025 pigs. Thinking that to be an error, the tech called the farmer directly.

"Is it true Mr. (Smith) that you lost 2,025 pigs?" she asked.

"Yeth." lisped the farmer.

Being a Howard County girl herself, the tech entered:

"Subject lost 2 sows and 25 pigs."

How Boar-ing…………….Chaplain Barnes

Last week’s answer:

4. Jesus was delivered in a:

a. Stable

b. Manger

c. Cave

d. Barn

e. Unknown *No word about it. See Luke 2:7

This week’s question:

5. A “manger” is a:

a. Stable for domestic animals

b. Wooden hay storage bin

c. Feeding trough

d. Barn